2.2 RB Musa Smith, Baltimore

[Ypsilanti Undead]

In a surprise move, the Hudson Valley Undead did not trade away a draft pick this morning. "Just because I pay absolutely no attention to college football and don't know one runningback from another, doesn't mean I don't think this is fun," said GM Jeremy Morse from his Ravenswood office. "And besides, I only trade away first rounders."

Then, in an elaborate ceremony resembling a Moose Lodge inauguration, Morse revealed the name of the Undead's first selection of the 2003 draft: "I hereby banish Musa Smith of Georgia to the Realm of the Undead!"

After the smoke had cleared, Morse shared some comments on the selection.

"We knew we wanted to make this pick with an eye toward long-term upside, without worrying about playing them this year or even next year. We took a good hard look at WR Kelley Washington, but then it occurred to us: isn't there some kind of curse for having three Bengals on the roster?

"We also gave some thought to Lee Suggs, but in the end we settled on Musa. Given the success of the Baltimore talent evaluators in recent years, if they think he's the third best back in the draft, who are we to argue? Even if I don't know how to pronounce his name. Is it Smith or Smythe?"

Morse then reminisced about his championship fantasy squad that had included Emmitt Smith, Robert Smith, and Jimmy Smith. Ah, memories.

Morse pooh-poohed Smith's recent diagnosis of a narrow spinal column, saying, "Yeah, and Einstein had a swollen brain, look how he turned out!"

ROFL!